Caroline: I find men such enigmas. How do you find them, Sally?
Henry: She finds them in transport cafes, mostly!
Henry: Oh yes, they say this woman with the sexual harrasment case may be able to make Bill Clinton exhibit his penis as evidence. The question is...
All: Will it stand up in court?!
Helen: Are you all right, George? Well, you sound as if you're hyperventilating. Oh, it's the smell. Yeah, bad, isn't it? People are always urinating in phone boxes - but not usually while you're in them!
Damien: What is all this whining about 'loving' and 'sharing' and not being whole without a partner? Let me tell you, I don't need anyone. I am quite capable of self-fulfilment.
George: Yes, that's what it says in the toilets at work!
Henry: Over the last twenty-five years, I have read the news drunk, concussed, stoned, with a live stoat in my underpants and once, on regional television, with my trousers round my ankles and a Lithuanian prostitute under the news desk!